Wednesday, November 25, 2015

a thanksgiving story with a side of shingles

Gather round, everyone, so you can hear my story.

Once upon a time this mom was so tired that she could not keep
her eyes open for what seemed like a month.

At the same time she started getting bites on her leg.
Bites that wouldn't heal and that hurt like the dickens.

She showed them to her friends and her sister and said,
"What kind of bug bite is this?"

And they said, "We don't know."
Which wasn't super helpful
but most of this mom's people aren't bug bite specialists
so she didn't hold it against them.

She thought she had bedbugs (please no) or a giant spider (terrifying) in her bed
that kept gnawing on one side of her leg from, ankle to knee.

She wondered why no one else was getting bitten in the house.
It made her feel a little sad.

Why was she so special to the bugs?
Why did the spider love her so much?

She was completely grossed out and
prepared to move to a new house because she doesn't do bugs.

She was also freaked out because if it was a spider,
the fang marks were so far apart, it must be huge.
Was the spider one of those giant chicken eating variety from the Amazon?

And mostly, she still just wanted to take a nap.

So finally after a week or so, with a yawn,
she e-mailed her doctor a picture of her scabby leg with the title,
"I have weird bites on my leg",
hoping that her doctor would be some kind of insect genius and
get right back to her and say,
"You have a crazy bug in your bed....GET THE HECK OUT!"

Instead, her doctor said,
"MMMM....looks like shingles...why don't you come on in?"

And so, she went in. And the doctor laughed at her spider theory.
And the fact that she had fabricated a whole bug invasion limited to one side of her leg.
And that this mom was planning on moving out of the house.
But she was very understanding
even though her patient was clearly on the verge of a mental breakdown.

The doctor gave her anti-viral meds and said,
"You need to rest...because you are STRESSED OUT."
And then said, "This should resolve itself in 3 or 4 weeks."

The doctor saying that it would take A MONTH to resolve the shingles
may have caused the patient SOME STRESS.

But now this mom knew that there were no bugs in her bed.
And no giant chicken eating spider in her house that preferred to nibble on her left leg.
And that possibly in a few weeks, she would feel normal.
Which is pretty great.

So she was thankful (see this is where the thanksgiving part of the story comes in.)
Very thankful.
Over the top thankful.
Beside herself with joy thankful.
It is a good day to be alive thankful.

Because shingles can be a blessing (because they are not bug or spider bites.)
So let's all give thanks.


Wednesday, November 18, 2015

the laundry fairy died

I just got home from a 5 day trip Monday night.
It was on the way home from the airport that Scott let me know that the dryer
had broken.

Luckily, I was so excited to see my boys that I just took it in stride.
I just wanted to hug them and kiss them. That is all.
"Okay. We will call Sears and have them come fix it."

Then I saw the laundry pile when I got home.
(Picture Mt. Vesuvius made out of dirty socks).

I asked Scott, "When was the last time you did laundry?"
He said, "When did I have time to do laundry?"
Jack said, "The Laundry Fairy left when you did, Mom."

We have an agreement...when one of us goes out of town...
it all comes down to survival.
I completely get it. We do what we have to to keep the children alive.
If it takes fast food runs and no clean underpants to keep the Aughtmon ship afloat?
That is how we roll.

Scott had washed the kids school uniforms for Monday and
dried them with the hot iron....for an hour and a half.
He is a dedicated man.
Jack said his pants were a bit on the damp side.

I called Sears yesterday morning to come fix our dryer....
they said they would be happy to come 10 days.

Sweet Mercy.
I had the boys bring all their dirty clothes out of their rooms.
(Picture Mt. Everest made out of smelly towels.)

Too. Much. Laundry. The S.S. Aughtmon. Is. Going. Down.

I had to call in reinforcements.
I washed all the boy's school uniforms and drove across town to dry them at
my sister in law, Cheri's, house.
She is a LIFE SAVER.
The only problem is if I do all of the laundry this way, I won't be done by January.

After driving home, I walked back in the door and told the boys,
"I have bad news.
The Laundry Fairy is dead.
I found her at the bottom of your dirty clothes hamper.
Starting next week, I am teaching you all how to do your own laundry."

It was at this point that the weeping and gnashing of teeth commenced.
Addie announced, "But I am just a baby."
I didn't blink. I just said, "It's time to be a big boy."

Growing up is hard.
I know this because I used to have a Laundry Fairy (my mom).
Then I became the Laundry Fairy. (not as much fun as it sounds)
And now it is time to pass on the legacy. (Welcome to the world, sweet sons of mine.)

Things are looking up.
I have a load of clothes hanging up on a temporary clothesline in the backyard.
It's a sunny day.
I may actually get the laundry done before Christmas.

Thursday, November 12, 2015

maybe you need a nap

I flew across country yesterday from San Francisco to Chicago
and from Chicago to White Plains.
This morning I woke up at my friend Camilla's house in Connecticut.
After sleeping for 12 hours.
12 hours.
I think the last time I slept for 12 hours was when I was an infant.

I have been messaging my doctor lately about how tired I have been.

I have been wanting to take naps in the afternoon and go to bed after dinner.
The crazy thing is that I hate naps.
Ever since I was a small child, I have abhorred these breaks in the day...
because you miss out on things when you nap.
But Scott and the boys have been exchanging looks across the dinner table that say,
"Is Mom going to fall asleep mid-salad?" Possibly.

My doctor took a gagillion blood samples last week and tested me from everything
from infection to hormones to vitamin deficiencies.
I got a message from her in Chicago yesterday.
Everything looks great. I am super healthy.

So apparently, I am just super tired.
Which is completely in keeping with the title of this blog...
confessions of a TIRED supergirl.
Sometimes it takes me a while to listen to my body.
Or to my own blog title.
Or to Jesus.

I guess He has to fly me to the East Coast before I will actually lie down.
It reminds me of the 23rd Psalm, when David says,

"He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside quiet waters.
He restores my soul."

MAKE is the operative word here.
Sometimes He has to MAKE us lie down.

Have you ever seen a toddler that is over tired, weeping uncontrollably and prone to tantrums?
And you are thinking, "Man, that kid is tired. Her mom needs to put her down for a nap."
That may or may not be me at the moment.

I am so wound up with writing deadlines, the boys school schedule,
the kids program at church and
life in general, that I have forgotten how to rest.
I want Jesus to restore my soul.
I just don't want to lie down in green pastures or follow Him beside the quiet waters.
But, apparently, those are non-negotiables.

So today, I am recognizing that I am tired.
Really, super, crazy tired.
And really, what I am missing out on when I don't take a nap,
is restoring my soul.
And that's not good.

Maybe you are right there with me, exhausted and bone weary.
I have a thought, that maybe just maybe,
we should let Jesus make us lie down.
It could be a start to a new way of living.

Maybe today's prayer should look something like this:

Thank you so much for knowing me better than I know myself.
Please make me lie down.
I am ready for those green pastures and still waters.

Show me how to rest in You.
Show me how to breathe and relax
and let go of the stress locked in between my shoulder blades.

I don't know how to get there on my own
but I am going to let you do the leading.
I am ready for some soul restoring.

Thank you  for caring about me so much and for loving me so well.


Then let's take a deep breath and....
Bring on the nap.