naps

I need a nap like I need oxygen.
This is due to the fact that after having Addison,
I developed insomnia. And it has been visiting again.
That means when I should be sleeping, I am not sleeping.
I am lying in my bed, tossing from side to side, twiddling
my thumbs, cursing the night.
Insomnia is a blight upon everything good and holy...like sleep.
For the last few days, when the sun cracks the sky,
I am loathe to climb out of my bed.
It seems as if I have had mere moments of sleep.
And maybe, if given the opportunity, I could sleep for an
entire week if I could just stay in bed.
So by 9:30 this morning, I was longing for a nap.
Which I know I am not supposed to take, because when you
have insomnia they say, "Whatever you do, DO NOT take a nap."
Because then you really won't sleep at night.
And to this I say, "I understand the general principle of what
you are saying here, but if there is anyway possible on this green earth,
that I can take a nap,I will be taking I nap."
By 10:00, I thought I might just keel over
on my head, mid-sentence, if I couldn't take a nap.
I called my mom, in Virginia, and said,
"Could you please fly here and watch my kids so that I can take a nap?"
Because you can not nap while your children are awake,
leaving them unsupervised, free to run a-muck in the house.
All manner of terrible things can occur, like loss of limbs,
ingesting of poisons or the re-arrangement of all of your spices,
if you sleep while your children are awake.
But this morning I was very desperate for a nap, you see, so I thought
I might give it a try. (Lack of sleep leads to insanity.)
I turned on some very educational television. Sesame Street.
Gave the children little snack filled bowls to occupy them.
Then I laid down on the couch next to the tv with a blanket.
Because in case a fire was started while I was napping,
I wanted to be in the same room with the children.
There was no fire or loss of limbs.
What there was, was a general excitement over me laying down
on the couch with a blanket.
Addison kept saying,"Hide! Hide!" And pulling the blanket over his head.
Then he thought it would be fun to climb over me
like a mommy jungle gym.
I believe I was hit in the head, at least once, with a ball.
Then he decided to feed me and began pushing cranberries and
peanuts from his snack mix into my mouth.
To which I tried to say pleasantly, "No, no! Mommy is taking a nap!"
All the while chewing the healthy snack and growing thirsty.
Next he tried taking books and lodging them in the space
between my neck and shoulders, begging me to,"Read! Read!"
And to this I must say,
"What on earth is television good for if it can not hold a child's attention?"
At this point, Will came and sat on me, so I asked him,
"Will, why won't Addie let me sleep?"
To which he answered with all the wisdom of a 4 year old sage,
"I think it is because he loves you so much
and he wants you to play with him."
So. No nap.
One can only pray for better sleep tonight.
Either that, or that my Mom will miraculously arrive tomorrow morning
so that I can take a nap.