thoughts on tantrums

If you have young children you know about tantrums.
Tantrums in our house are followed by a healthy time out.
Addison has recently taken to fits.
He can't understand why I would go against his wishes.
He thinks I'm holding out on him -
keeping him from the good stuff.
He doesn't get that he is almost always on the brink of death,
trying to ingest legos or sticking his fingers near the fan,
and it is my job to keep him safe.
He likes to bang his head on the floor
to show his disapproval of things not going his way.
At least he favored that method until he experienced
the hard wood floors at Aunt Jenny's house.
That put a bit of a kybosh on the head banging.
I threw a nice tantrum myself the other day.
Things just weren't going my way.
Life felt mean and unfair.
I felt a tantrum welling up within me.
And I thought maybe it would be nice to bang my head on the floor.
I didn't do it but I thought about it.
I know Scott was thinking I definitely needed a time out.
Sometimes I think God is holding out on me,
keeping me from the good stuff.
And then, after a good cry, I had this thought.
Maybe I am where I am, dealing with what I am dealing with,
because I am almost always on the brink of death
and He is just keeping me safe.
It's just a thought.