Like an overwhelming wave of softness that settles on your soul.
Or a heavy calm, a contentedness that sits in your mind.
But most days, with 3 little boys, 1 big one, a church plant,
school activities, bills, mildew on the shower curtain and
a small gathering of ants camping out near the foot of the tub,
I find myself screeching, "Can't I get a little bit of peace in here?"
Sometimes I think I should be able to find peace in my bathroom
if I just lock the door. Or by reading a book under a throw on the couch.
Or by driving far away by myself with a tall cafe misto from Starbucks.
But that is more like an escape.
So maybe peace isn't a feeling. Maybe it is an action.
Choosing to go with what God is sending my way without resistance. Peace.
Accepting the chaos and the joy of a full household with a resounding, "Yes!"
instead of trying to retreat. Peace.
Revelling in the moment instead of worrying about the future. Peace.
Looking the things that scare me the most in the eye and moving forward. Peace.
Maybe peace is forgetting about my limitations and focusing on God's abilities.
Or maybe peace is about the passing of fear.
The knowledge that circumstances are not changing but the way I view God and his place in my life is.
I'm not sure how this next year is going to turn out. But God knows. Peace.
I gained 5 lbs eating scones at Christmas. But God loves me anyway. Peace.
I don't understand how life works. But God does. Peace.
I'm not exactly sure how peace moves or how it found its way into my soul.
But I felt a small surge of it this morning.
And I'm going with it.