you know that he gets stuck in some freakish time warp where
he keeps living the same day over and over again.
That would tend to grate on one's nerves I would think.
Doing the same things every...single...day.
Even as I am typing this I have a sense that my life is not that different.
That getting ready for school each morning is a bit like a perpetual ground hog's day.
1. Wake up. Put on my robe.
2. Make peanut butter toast.
3. Put on the coffee. (Oh, sweet heavens, thank you for the coffee.)
4. Wake the children with soft tender good mornings.
5. Check to see if lunches are made. Put them by the door.
6. Wake the children with a cheery hello and flip the light on.
7. See why there are no clean socks when you have been doing laundry for 4 consecutive days...apparently, the sock fairy has stolen them and left gray balls of lint in their place.
8. Yell at the children and give them a shake, "Get up already! Do you want to be late?" Apparently, they do.
9. Clutch at the coffee cup like it is a sweet nectar of heavenly light.
Because it is.
10. Apologize to the children,"I'm sorry mommy is so angry in the morning but I was only angry the last time I called you. The other two times I was all sunshine and roses....why are you not up yet?"
11. Dress the toddler. Pick up the toddler from his early morning I-disapprove-of-your-underwear-choice-for-me tantrum and carry him to the table for breakfast.
12. Call half dressed children to the table.
13. Tell them, "This is not a diner. I am not a short order cook. There are no eggs available or pancakes or frozen waffles for that matter. Why do you think we are having peanut butter toast?"
14. Resume search for socks. Mismatched pairs will do.
15. Re-dress toddler. He is wearing his peanut butter toast.
16. Refill coffee cup.
17. Inspect children. They are all alive. Decide to let the crazy hair and
mismatched socks go for the sake of ones sanity.
18. Begin the toothbrush chant. "Brush your teeth! Brush your teeth!"
19. Make sure children have backpacks, homework and lunches in hand.
20. Breath check at the door. Unload children of their backpacks, homework and lunches. Resume toothbrush chant with more vigor.
"BRUSH YOUR TEETH! BRUSH YOUR TEETH!"
21. Re-load children with backpacks, homework and lunches.
22. Load into van. Pass off the torch to husband who will take the children to school- bless his heart.
23. Collapse on couch amidst a pile of mismatched socks.
Monday morning routine?