Sunday, January 22, 2012

the long dream

I have been thinking a lot about chasing dreams lately.
About how our hopes for better things get us moving
and how our longing for being more
than we are gets us to overcome our fears.
Scott and I started chasing the dream of planting a church
on the San Francisco peninsula 7 years ago next week.
We had grand plans. We rented a 900 seat theater.
There were 11 of  us on our team.
4 of which were children aged 3 and under.
Everyone counts.... don't let anyone tell you different.
We had visions of filling the theater.
Than our vision changed to finding a place that fit our size.
We moved three times and ended up back in our house
for a year and half.
This wasn't necessarily the dream we dreamed for ourselves.
There were Sundays where once the worship team got up,
we were singing to empty seats. And Jesus, of course.
We hope He liked it. We felt kind of weird.
We have had Sundays where we have felt like the the power of the Lord
was going to blow the roof off...momentum was building.
And there have been Sundays where we have had more kids than adults.
(Which I think is kind of cool for our kids church...
but a bit unspiring for Scott as he stands up to speak.....)
In the past 7 years, I had my 3rd child,
 battled some heinous post partum,
had some much needed therapy with 2 different counselors,
wrote 3 books, worked 3 different jobs, and have had to commit
fully to coloring my hair...gray is not a part of the dream.
Scott has had to live with me (bless him!)
all the while working a full time teaching job
along with trying to grow a fledgling church, raising financial support,
discipling a guys group, counseling with people,
prepping his sermons on Saturdays all without a gall bladder.
Gall bladder surgery happened around year 4.
I think Scott misses it a little bit.
We really had no idea what chasing this dream would look like.
About 1 1/2 year ago, I told Scott, "I'm in."
And he said, "For what?"
"For planting a church."
He said, "Nice to know you are finally on board."
Some of us take a little more time than others to embrace the dream.
But we have checked our hearts and our prayers lately
and the dream has not changed.
The dream of telling people about Jesus and of seeing lives transformed.
The dream of teaching kids about God's love and seeing broken people healed.
It says in Psalms 37:34,
Don't be impatient for the LORD to act!
Travel steadily along his path. He will honor you, giving you the land.
You will see the wicked destroyed.
I am almost always impatient for the Lord to act.
But sometimes I think God puts a long dream in front of us.
A dream where we have to keep following steadily along his path
hanging tight to the hopes He has given us
even when He has only shown us small glimpses of the promised land.
Like Joseph whose path to power led him through
a prolonged prison sentence.
Or Sarah who waited 26 years before God gave her the son
He promised her.
Those are long dreams.
So this next week are celebrating 7 years with our church.
Celebrating who we have been, who we are right now and who we will
become as we keep chasing after what God has called us to.
We are going to have pizza and maybe some chocolate cake.
And then we are going to keep right on dreaming.
Because the good part is coming.
You can count on it.


Lindsey said...

Love you Sue, thanks for being faithful :)

susanna said...

Love you back, Lindsey! You were one of the OP (original Pathwayers!) :) We miss you tons!

pamelitarose said...

Thank you for sharing this...Trent and I have been talking about having a dream. Somewhere along the way we just got into survival mode and we recently realized that we don't just want to survive, we want to live...really live. I forwarded your blog to him. I think he'll chuckle because of the realities of life that are so close to home... The 3rd child, moving to a new place for ministry, renting/buying/selling/renting houses, therapy (same counselor 3 different times), starting to parent 2 teen girls, running a design bus, and learning to color my hair. Thanks for sharing your dream! Blessings as you celebrate and continue on with the Lord's work!! <3