2012 was a hard year. It yanked the joy out of me.
But I really like joy. I like laughter. I like hope.
From listening to me you would think that I like crankiness.
And depression. And that I enjoy a hearty portion of irritability.
It's as if I've decided to emulate Eeyore in my life view.
What would it take for me to wake up and feel a sense of expectation
of what the day holds instead of dread at the thought of what is required
What would it take to turn my heart inside out, empty it of the sadness
and fill it with hope?
I know that some of my sadness comes from losing a dear friend recently.
But I also know that some of it comes from choosing to focus on the hard
things in my life instead of choosing to see the beauty that each day holds.
So I have decided I am going to change.
Because I am the only one who can do that.
This is what my to do list has looked like in the past:
1. Do the laundry
2. Pick up the house
3. Finish the bills
4. Clean out the shed
5. Write for 3 hours
6. Take the car in for a smog check
No wonder I am sad.
I am going to pin up a new to do list on the fridge.
This is my list for this week...I think I can get them all done.
1. Listen to a really good song
2. Write a love note to each of the boys
3. Dance for 10 minutes
4. Organize or decorate something (I love to organize and decorate)
5. Go for a walk or have coffee with a friend
6. Watch a Tim Hawkins video
7. Talk to my sisters on the phone
8. Play cards with the boys
9. Tell Scott why you love him
10. Sit in the sun and read Psalm 139
I may still have to do the bills or fold laundry but sticking them in
between dancing and reading about how God formed me with love
and a purpose seems to make it better somehow.
I am on a mission to be joy- full this year.
I am making a decision to ask Jesus to re-shape how I think - to transform me
by the renewing of my mind.
I am on a path towards seeing life differently and embracing that loveliness
that is already surrounding me.
Feel free to join me! :)