Friday, April 10, 2015
just hold on....I am having a moment
I am surrounded by them 24/7.
They make me laugh.
They fill me with joy.
I can't get enough of them.
But in spite of all the joys of living with boys,
we still have a lot of work to do in the social skills department.
When I got my hair cut last month,
Will came up to the car after school and asked,
"Do you want me to tell you what I think of your hair?"
He had a worried expression on his face.
I looked at him and said, "No. I don't. Please get in the car."
Addie got in the backseat and looked at me and said,
"Mom, I think you have a mullet."
To which I said, amid a great amount of laughter, "It is not a mullet. And you are mean."
This comment came on the heels of Addie recently mentioning how much he loves my arms
because they are so squishy and chubby.
The statements have started to erode my self confidence.
I have started to doubt myself....do I have a mullet?
Are my arms lovable because they are squishy and chubby.?
These are the kinds of thoughts that plague you when you have boys.
Then there was the moment this week, when Jack told me that he thought
Addison smelled like peanut butter,
Dad smelled like breath mints and sweat,
and that I smelled like breakfast and anger.
Somehow Will got off without having his "smell" identified.
I am pretty sure I do smell like anger.
Because once you tell me that is what I smell like... I become angry.
Even after all these years, the children have still not learned that there is a time
to speak your thoughts and a time to keep your mouth shut in hopes of self preservation.
But this week when we were getting in the car to go visit cousins,
an incredible thing happened.
As I buckled myself in, Will said, "Mom, did you put perfume on?"
Jack chimed in, "It's called taking a shower, Will."
I answered, "I put on some lotion."
He leaned forward and said, "Mom, you smell really good and you look pretty."
I almost fainted. And wept. Simultaneously.
As I blinked back a tear, I said, "Thank you, Will!"
Joy and thankfulness burst forth in my heart.
I was light headed with the beauty of it.
So that's what it feels like to get a compliment from your child.
Later that afternoon when Will came into my room I told him,
"Will, when you told me that I smelled nice and looked pretty today,
you made me feel great. Thank you for saying those things."
He grinned and said, "Well, Mom...that's because you ARE great."
And there it was.
Weeks from now when my kids tell me my bangs are weird
and that they can see the back of my underwear when I am picking up their toys
and that I need to stop dancing because I am embarrassing them
and that they can't believe how old I am, because really I am so old,
I will think about this moment...
this moment of high praise and love and deep regard....
and remember what it was like.....
when I was great.