Thursday, March 17, 2016
sometimes a girl needs new stretchy pants
These last few months have been wild with school events,
church gatherings and writing deadlines.
So we decided to get a dog.
Our son, Addison, has been begging for a dog for years.
Or as he says, "Since I was born."
So this past Saturday, for his 10th birthday,
Addie found his dream dog at the shelter near our house.
He is in dog love heaven.
I had not thought I was really a small dog person.
But I also have fallen under Flash the Dog's,
spell of generous kisses and happiness.
So when the boys leave for school, Flash and I go for a walk.
I put on my work out clothes and get in a little exercise with this new pal.
We walk around the block.
Flash sniffs the whole world.
He barks at fellow dogs.
He tries to lunge at any cat he sees.
He does his business and we head back home.
This morning as we were coming down the street, I saw my neighbor, Michelle.
We said, "Hi!" She was getting ready to get in her car.
She noticed the big jacket I was wearing.
"It's super cold out this morning!"
I agreed and laughed, "Yes! Do you like my parka!"
In California, we wear snow clothes when it gets below 60 degrees outside.
She laughed, too. I said, "We are true Californians. We can't take weather!"
We said good-bye and I headed up the driveway to my house.
It really was so cold. Why was I so cold?
I got inside, bent over and unleashed Flash.
It was at this point that I realized that my stretchy work out pants
were rolled down in the back.
LIKE. ALL. THE. WAY.
They had found a resting place under my rear.
So I was basically STANDING IN MY UNDERWEAR framed by stretchy pants.
I have some questions for my stretchy pants...
When exactly did you give out, Stretchy Pants?
Why didn't I feel your downward slide?
Have I lost all feeling in my lower extremities?
Was my parka covering my underwear while I was walking?
Did Michelle have a bird's eye view of my polka dot panties?
Did the entire world?
We will never know.
But I know one thing, I am going to go purchase some new stretchy pants.
For the sake of the neighborhood and myself.
And possibly some cuter underwear.