Friday, September 30, 2016
i'm bringing sexy back
I went to see my doctor this past week.
She couldn't stop smiling when I asked for my SECOND orthopedic shoe.
A matched pair.
To go with my new crutches.
Then she sent me down to radiology for xrays...again.
She handed me more paper tape for my toes...a timely gift.
(Note: The old crutches which were my son, Will's, were worn down to the nubs.)
The nurse instructed me how to use the crutches.
Probably since I broke my second toe using Will's crutches incorrectly.
I'm still not great on them.
When I swung out into the hall, I was having trouble holding the tape
and wielding my crutches.
A doctor and a nurse pressed themselves against the wall
to miss the ungainly arc of my crutch passing by.
The doctor asked, "Are you okay?" He was concerned. "How can we help you?"
"I'm okay! I will just stick the tape to the crutches!"
I lurched passed them with the tape flapping behind me. I could tell they weren't convinced.
By the time I made it through xrays and out to the parking lot, I was in a full body sweat.
Crutches are no joke.
I leaned up against a pole waiting for Scott to bring the car around
and received several empathetic nods and looks of pity.
Finally, one elderly gentleman walked by me, gave my feet a glance and said,
"I really hope someone is coming to pick you up!"
He could have easily lapped me with a walker.
When the boys got home from school Addie perked up and said,
"Hey, Mom! Now you have two ugly shoes...not just one."
I told him, "Thanks for pointing that out, Addie!"
My friend, Tina, offered to bedazzle them for me.
But I think I will leave them as is...knowing me I would probably trip on a loose sequin
and sprain something else.
I am embracing them in all of their orthopedic glory.
I welcome their protection from my unpracticed crutch abilities.
They may not be pretty but they are offering safe harbor for the rest of my toes.
And that....is a thing of beauty.